Okay, it’s been a while since I made an update here, my weekends have been extremely hectic, and haven’t had time to blog or even read emails. The newest development in my life at the current moment is that I have applied as a volunteer for the peace corps. As I understand it there are currently 4,000 positions and about 11,000 applicants, which means I have to beat out two other people for my post. I really want to go, so many things in my life have become clear, and this seems like such a natural next step. I was driving home from work today and at the street corner there was a woman with a “please help, hungry” sign. I didn’t help her, I have just been burned too many times by those people, but I had a hard time reconciling my feelings that I want to help people, like in peace corps, but I didn’t help her, the only answer I could come up with is that the people I will be helping in peace corps have never been given a chance, and are willing to work hard to improve, and sometimes I am not sure I believe that is true about street people in America. I stop and ask them some questions sometimes, to find out if I think they are really down and out, and about half the time they are people that need help and I help them, although I have noticed I have a weakness for people with animals, and single mothers with children, I get a feeling sometimes that I am an easy touch for people like that. It’s so hard to parse it all, and make it make sense, Sometimes I think I need to accept that I will never be wealthy, and that that should never be a concern for me, accept a vow of functional poverty and just try to help as many worthy people as I can, it’s not the American way, but it’s the only thing that seems to make sense right now.